‘the pain is not here to hurt you, but to teach you’

It’s pitch black outside, i have had my first cup of coffee which i promised myself i wouldn’t have and am getting dressed. You know how some people have profound affects on your life. well i am getting dressed for one such person.

my nephew matthew. 20 years old. he is off to hospital for a biopsy on his heart to see if it is strong enough for an op he needs. he had a heart transplant when he was 8. matthew is one of those people born with the gift of seeing. he sees other people’s pain, very rarely his own. after his heart transplant, as he lay cut all the way down his chest, i asked him how he was doing. ‘i just want them to find a heart for my brother,’ is all he said. his older brother also needed a heart transplant.. His brother three months later had his heart transplant.

a few years later when i myself was walking a very dark and lonely path, at age 11,he got his older friend to drive to my home so that he could sit with me and let me know i was not alone. Such compassion and such depth, so young.

so many hours, so many days, spent in ICU, he has only ever once shown that he carries any pain, and in that moment, as he broke down, i realised just how brave he is and how strong he had been.

there is so much i can say about math, about the lessons he has taught me, but right now i have to get to the hospital to be with him. i know i am blessed to walk this path with him.

If you’re reading this, can you send him some of the love and the miracle he needs today. thank you xxx

and to all the organ donors out there, from my family to you, thank you.

it is truly the gift of life, precious, beautiful, achy, happy life



12 responses to “‘the pain is not here to hurt you, but to teach you’

  1. I am praying for Matthew. He is a beautiful gift in this precious, beautiful, achy, happy life.

  2. SD, I’m sending both of you all the love I have…he’s so very lucky to have you by his side. xo

  3. What a good aunt you are! I’m so glad to see that the biopsy went well, I’ll be looking to see what the full results are. My thoughts are with your family.

    – Emily

    • Thank you so much emily. We will have a clearer picture tomorrow. this support means a lot to me and my family, thanks.
      it is easy to be a good aunt with math, that’s for sure 🙂 viv

  4. It is very true that many of those who suffer from terrible pain are very brave and don’t complain as much as us the healthy ones.

    I’m wishing Matthew all the very best with the biopsy and will have safe operation.

  5. Just a quick hello everyone to let you know that the doctors are happy with Matthew’s heart biopsy and other tests, they however are not convinced they can operate. we are just happy that there has been no deterioration in heart function and no rejection. we will wiat to see about the operation.
    thanks again for all your support. angels all of you x

  6. Great news – math had the op he needed, and all went well, and so the beautiful crazy journey continues, thanks to all of you for helping bring this miracle into matthew’s life. he is up and at it, already back up north and home, full of life and being a wonderfully rebellious 20-year-old which i am beginning to think is causing his folks more grey hairs than anything else 🙂
    i am soooo happy xx

  7. Woowha! What a beautiful story. I used to be very precious about the organ doner thing. Now, with recycling, and my attachment lessening – even to my own body, I see the wonder in that beautiful gift.

    Thanks for stopping by SOE.

    • Thanks ames, to see the beautiful gift in action, is mindblowing and wonder-full and leaves me extremely humbled and in deep gratitude for such deep love from strangers.

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